


Memorial

by daddygorgon



Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-17
Updated: 2020-06-17
Packaged: 2021-03-04 04:07:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 713
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24777370
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/daddygorgon/pseuds/daddygorgon





	Memorial

"Hey Billy. It's me again..." With his hands in his pockets, Shawn stood over his brother's grave. It had only been a few days, but he visited every chance he got. "I know I've told you this millions of times, but I'll say it again, and I'll keep saying it... I'm sorry. I messed up... There's... there's nothing I can do about it. I can't make it up to you, I... I can't take any of it back." He sighed, _very_ deeply, closing his eyes and hanging his head. "I was a terrible older brother, I wasn't there for you when I should have been, I left you all alone to put up with Neil, and his... and his bullshit." Shawn knew that there was nothing that could be done to bring his brother back, but he knew for sure that he had to look out for his remaining siblings, no matter what.  
He almost never came today, if it wasn't for Archie, Shawn wouldn't have come at all. Archie convinced him to make the visit, to talk to his brother. Archie said it would help him heal, Shawn doubted it at first, he felt that it only hurt him more. But that was wrong, he could feel himself slowly healing.   
"God... I wish you got to meet him. Archie has been a really great guy, I... I just wish that I brought you along. To actually know that it was like to have somebody to care for you... to..." He opened his eyes as he felt a tear fall. "to make you feel loved. Archie has been the father I never had, he was there when I was feeling the worst, when I needed somewhere safe to be. If only I saw that you needed that as well... maybe you could have turned out different... I loved you dude. You have no idea how much. I never realized how important you actually were, because... because I was so caught up in my own pain..." He had to stop talking because he knew he was going to break down if he continued. This brought him to wiping the tears away, and stifling a sob. It was at times like these that he had somebody to hug, somebody to reassure him that Billy was there.  
Shawn was losing hope, in himself, he believed that there was no way he could make it through this. It hurt too much. Just thinking about it tore him up. In his head, it was a battle, on whether or not he should just give up, or if he should doing the things he did.   
"Hey, kid. Your brother loved you. It doesn't matter if you abandoned him. Like you, Billy wanted what was best, he didn't care if he had problems of his own." The hand that found its way onto his shoulder made him jump, but it was only Archie. "Do you wanna know how I know that? Even though you guys grew apart, there's a bond between you two, one that can never be broken. You both loved each other _so_ much, that the others problems was more important than your own."  
"How could you know that? You and Billy never met. Not even once."  
"I've heard a lot about him, Shawn. All of it from you. From what you've told me, you guys were _really_ close."   
"I'm sorry, Arch. I just... I'm not in a good place right now."  
"I know, kid. I know." Archie nodded his head, then gave Shawn the biggest dad hug. "I'll have you know, I'll always be right there for you. You know I'm good for it. I've watched you grow up. I'm proud of the man you've become."  
"Thanks... I just... I don't know what to do. I had plans to apologize to him, but he... before I even got the chance to."  
"Listen. You don't get good at life by letting everything dump you into the garbage. You have to realize that it's a chance for you to grow. To get stronger. But you have to remember, do _not_ forget. The happy memories, the sad memories. You heal, you grow, you live on. Remember these things as the things that made you who you are. Hold onto that."


End file.
